A Deeper Look: STARTTS Master Class on Coercive Control

The STARTTS Coercive Control Clinical Master Class served as a powerful and timely deep dive into a form of domestic abuse that is often misunderstood. By combining academic theory, a real-world case study, and a candid panel discussion, the event provided a comprehensive view of coercive control’s profound impact, particularly within migrant and refugee communities.  

The content from Dr Manjula Datta O’Connor Adjunct Professor, Rebecca Wall, and STARTTS’ CEO Jorge Aroche was a crucial reminder that recognising this abuse requires looking beyond physical violence and understanding the insidious, often invisible, nature of psychological manipulation. 

The master class was held just over a year after New South Wales introduced its landmark coercive control laws, which came into effect on July 1, 2024. At the time, the first standalone criminal offense of its kind in Australia, the law carries a maximum penalty of seven years in jail. The real-world application of this legislation became evident six months after its commencement when the first charges were laid. The case, involving a man from Leeton who pleaded guilty to locking his wife inside their home, smashing her phone, and threatening to murder her, provided a grim first-hand account of the kind of behaviours the law is intended to capture. While the law marks a significant step forward, the master class made it clear that this legal change is just one part of a larger effort. It requires a holistic understanding of the complex psychological, social, and cultural dynamics that professionals must navigate to ensure justice and provide effective support to survivors. 

Walking on Eggshells 

Dr. Manjula Datta O’Connor, an adjunct professor, psychiatrist and author of Daughters of Durga, laid the groundwork by defining coercive control as a pattern of domination, manipulation, and intimidation that is distinct from a typical relationship conflict.  

The constant state of “walking on eggshells” is a metaphor for the victim’s experience of hypervigilance and fear, where a moment of affection can instantly turn into a moment of terror. Dr. O’Connor detailed the systematic progression of this abuse, which often begins with “love bombing” to build trust, followed by a gradual process of isolation. This is a key tactic where the perpetrator cuts the victim off from their support network, making them entirely dependent. 

The presentation highlighted several core strategies of control: 

• Emotional Abuse: Undermining a victim’s self-esteem through insults, belittling, and humiliation. 

• Economic Abuse: Restricting access to money, controlling household income, or making major financial decisions without consent. For migrant women, this can include demanding payments or gifts in the context of marriage, known as dowry, a form of financial coercion. 

• Gaslighting: A particularly cruel form of mental manipulation where the perpetrator makes the victim doubt their own reality, judgment, and sanity. 

• Surveillance: Monitoring phones, emails, and movements, a tactic that has become amplified by modern technology. 

Dr. O’Connor also discussed the devastating mental health impacts, which go far beyond simple anxiety or depression. Victims often suffer from complex PTSD, a condition that includes difficulties with emotional regulation, a negative self-perception, and an inability to form healthy relationships. She explained the neuroscience of fear, describing how the conflict between a person’s need for attachment and their constant state of terror can cause them to dissociate, or mentally check out, as a survival mechanism. This entire process fundamentally changes the victim’s personality and sense of self. 

A Clinical Perspective 

Rebecca Wall, a counsellor and accredited mental health social worker at STARTTS, provided a powerful, human-centered case study that brought Dr. O’Connor’s theories to life. Her work with a young refugee girl she called “Sammy” demonstrated the profound impact of coercive control and the challenges of therapeutic intervention. Sammy had experienced a lifetime of developmental and intergenerational trauma, leaving her brain “organised around threats.” The coercive control she faced included threats of being sent away, blackmail, and being withheld from school and medical support. 

Rebecca’s approach was deeply compassionate and multifaceted, centred on the core goal of creating safety. She explained that this had to happen on multiple levels: 

• Safety in the Relationship: Building a trusting, stable therapeutic bond was the foundation of the work, providing Sammy with her first experience of a relationship free from violence and control. 

• Internal Safety: Rebecca used a bio-psychosocial lens, addressing the basics of sleep and nutrition before moving into psychological and somatic interventions. These included biofeedback and walking sessions to help Sammy regulate her nervous system and recognise that she had some control over her physiology. 

• External Safety: The therapeutic process worked alongside the legal system, with family members removed from the home under AVOs. 

Recognising the complexity of Sammy’s case, Rebecca referred her to the Child and Adolescent and Youth Mental Health Service. This was a critical step in obtaining a complete biopsychosocial picture and getting a professional opinion on potential biological treatments. This referral underscored a key takeaway: complex cases like Sammy’s require a collaborative, multidisciplinary approach, and no single therapist should be expected to manage such a client alone. 

Rebecca emphasised the importance of being patient and respectful, especially when dealing with a client who initially struggled to engage. She also shared the personal toll this work took, acknowledging the countertransference – the maternal feelings she had for Sammy – and the need for her own robust self-care and supervision to manage vicarious trauma. This insight highlighted a crucial aspect of working in this field: the practitioner’s own well-being is vital to their ability to provide effective, long-term support. 

The Broader Picture 

The panel discussion, moderated by Jorge Aroche, expanded the conversation to systemic and community-level challenges. When asked about specific resources, Dr. O’Connor noted the scarcity of dedicated tools for migrant women, encouraging practitioners to consult Australian government health websites and her own NGO’s research. 

A key point of discussion was the difficulty of addressing coercive control in communities where leaders may be perpetrators themselves. The panellists agreed that change cannot be imposed from the outside; instead, it requires an “insider-outsider” approach. By working with multiple community organisations and leaders, it’s possible to create a form of peer pressure to be part of the solution. 

The panel also touched on the prevalence of coercive control in young relationships, where jealousy is often normalised as a sign of love. This raised concerns about a lack of education in schools regarding healthy relationships, consent, and respect. Dr. O’Connor also pointed out the alarming issue of sibling abuse, a widespread but often overlooked form of control and sexual abuse that begins in the home. 

Ultimately, the master class underscored a critical truth: while the law provides a vital framework for justice, the real work of ending coercive control lies in a multi-pronged approach. It requires deep clinical understanding, compassionate and patient support for survivors, and a dedicated, community-based advocacy effort to change cultural norms and educate everyone on what constitutes healthy, respectful relationships. 

The insights from this master class are invaluable for anyone working in mental health, social work, or community services. For a deeper understanding of this complex topic, you can watch the full master class online. To stay informed about future training opportunities and events, we encourage you to sign up for updates from STARTTS. 

Register here.